Wednesday 8 January 2014

New year, new parenting goal

I can't believe this is my first post for 2014, so let me start by wishing you all a Happy New Year! It can be hard to motivate ourselves in the midst of a cold, dark winter and nowadays I don't really do new year's resolutions. Yet, with all the talk of them around this time and the whole thought of an untouched year lying ahead, it is hard to resist giving a little thought about what we might like to achieve in the months to come.

I humoured my family by announcing on new year's eve that my new year's resolution was going to be to shout less. Yes, I am ashamed to say that even Mummy Zen loses her feeling of 'zen' sometimes! We all know shouting is not an effective way of dealing with a challenging situation but unfortunately it can come too easily when we are feeling particularly exasperated. We regret it as soon as we do it and it creates an unpleasant atmosphere for everyone.

I also had the idea that I wanted to try to read more this coming year. I've gone from being someone who would fly through books in a weekend to someone who struggles to get through two books a year! Realistically, with young children to take care of, my weekends of devouring a book are long gone for now but I recognise that I can make time in an evening to read a few pages and that's what I would like to do.

Having just finished a book, I had another one in mind that I was going to start reading but then I remembered my goal to shout less and the fact that there was a book on the shelf that may compliment that very aim. So I've started reading, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk. I have heard lots of good things about the book and even from just the first few pages I have read so far, I think it will be a helpful read. No doubt I will report back in due course...

We can all improve as parents, no matter how good a job we think we do. It's definitely not easy to break our parenting habits or work on something we know would be better addressed but I think we owe it to our children to do the best we can.

Is there a parenting goal you might consider tackling this year? Is there an aspect of your parenting where you recognise there is room for improvement?
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7 comments:

  1. Sounds like a great book. I'll have to look for it. I also find myself shouting, and am glad I'm not the only one! My parenting goal is to sit and eat with my kids. I often do dishes and other little chores while they're eating a meal. I'd like to take time to sit and be with them at the table. Happy New Year!

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    1. Thanks for being honest and admiting you are known to shout too ;-). I like your goal of sitting with your children while they eat. I try my hardest to do the same with mine but like you, sometimes I do dishes or other food prep. It's a great one to focus on and if your children are anything like mine, they'll do a better job of eating if you're sitting there with them.

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  2. As you know, my kids are older now, which brings its share of joys and challenges. I wish I were more understanding of my son's ways, a boy's ways. He goes about doing things when he's good and ready and it drives me crazy. Yet I'm slowly learning that pushing doesn't work. He needs to let things marinate a bit and then, when it makes sense to him, he goes out and does whatever needs to be done. May I be more patient and trusting in his ability to handle life on his terms...

    Regarding meal time: I always ate with the children as my husband would not come home till later. And then I would do the dishes while my other half was eating. :)

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    1. Thanks for your comment Maryse, which just shows how we are always still learning to be a better parent and learning from our children as their personalities and needs change and develop over the years. It sounds like you understand really well how your son likes to approach life :-)

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  3. I think there's always room for improvement. In my case, patience. It's not Damien's fault that my hormones are malfunctioning. I have to find a way because he lights up my life and I want to do the same for him.
    Good post. x

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    1. Thanks Tracy and what a good and important goal. We can all probably relate to improving our patience with our children! From everything you write and share, it sounds to me like you are doing a great job of being a fantastic mother to him but I agree, there is always room for improvement and it can only be a good thing to try a bit harder :-). x

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Thank you for reading. I'd love to have your comments and thoughts!