Treasuring time

Not a lot of spare time for me at the moment, as you'll have realised from the lack of new posts on the blog ;-). Whilst with our first baby, my husband and I found it difficult to even find time to shower or make some food, second time round, we're managing a lot better with fitting in those basics at least. Yet, there's a lot of things we struggle to find the time for, like keeping on top of the washing, cleaning and household chores and having a moment to put our feet up with a book or film is a luxury we're not enjoying as often as we were.

Having family around to help out in these first few weeks following our daughter's birth has really made me recognise the value of time and how quick we are to take it for granted. I've felt lucky to have our families take both children out for an hour or so to allow me to do one of the many tasks I've been meaning to do, to catch up on a bit of sleep or as now, to write my blog.

With just one child, I'd got into a nice routine with our son with set times when I could get jobs done or do something for myself. Now there's a newborn around, those precious moments have disappeared for the time being. After you're used to having spare time that you don't even stop to think about, it's hard not having it all of a sudden. However, it's a useful lesson in reminding us that time should be treasured.

Although these first few weeks and months with a new baby and toddler can be a bit tricky, stressful and certainly tiring, I don't want to wish away the time with our daughter while she is such a tiny vulnerable little being needing lots of love and care. I'm all too aware of how fast a baby grows up now and how important it is to enjoy each day with them. This time round I also know that the challenges of getting through weeks on very little sleep, the bouts of crying that seem neverending or the days when everything seems to go wrong are stages that are going to pass.

Probably sooner than I realise, I'll get settled into a new routine with two children that will once again provide pockets of time where I can get a few things done. For now, I'm happy to take each day as it comes and not to worry if I feel like nothing gets done. I might not have these sentiments every day (we had a fairly good night's sleep last night!) but on the days I don't, I will endeavour to remind myself of what really matters - not the housework but being there for my two little ones.
---
Photo credit
---

The waiting game

First things first........I had my baby! It was a girl! So many people, including lots of random strangers in the street told me I was having a boy so I'm especially pleased to have proved them all wrong - you can't judge a bump by its shape :-). It was a lovely surprise and my husband, son and I are really enjoying the new addition to our family.

I have already mentioned on here that my son was born at 38 weeks and how some people assuming the second child would also be early, started acting like it was late once we passed the 38 week mark. Well, our daughter arrived at exactly 41 weeks so I had to endure 3 weeks of questions, comments, and 'tips' on how to get things moving along.

Aside from running a marathon, I really had tried lots of the suggestions for helping initiate labour. Three cups of well-steeped raspberry leaf tea each day, spicy food, lots of walking, running up hills and chasing my son and his friends around the park, that and everything else on lists like this one. Some people swear that something in particular contributed to their labour starting but I think it's pure coincidence. Baby comes when it's ready and when your body's ready for birth.

A quick glance at three different pregnancy books I have at home revealed that 'late' is not really late until you reach week 42 and beyond. In most cases, baby will arrive within 10 days of the due date and according to one book I have, "studies show that about 70% of apparent post-term pregnancies aren't post-term at all", it's simply a miscalculation of the due date / date of conception.So why does everyone treat 'late' like it's such a big deal?

I was thankful that I was living in the UK, planning to give birth at a birth centre where there's a focus on natural births and no pressure for induction unless there's any medical concern for mum or baby. I've heard too many stories of people who've used private healthcare and have been persuaded to have an induction earlier than necessary that has resulted in an emergency c-section or an otherwise traumatic birth.

Whilst I felt relaxed about my pregnancy lasting longer than first time round and was feeling fit and well, I couldn't help but start to get a little stressed out when people would ask me, 'what's going to happen?', 'when will they induce you?'. I didn't feel like those kinds of questions were very sensitive or helpful when I was only a few days 'late' after all.

One thing I have taken from the experience of having a 'late' baby is that I won't be one of those annoying people asking a pregnant friend or aquantaince where her baby is when it comes to her due date and the baby is yet to arrive! I don't think I was before but I'll certainly be more aware in the future of what I say to anyone in that situation.

A mum-to-be has a lot to deal with in late pregnancy; the hormones, the excitement, the trepidation, the preparation (both on a practical and emotional level) and she doesn't need people adding to it. As I know myself, a healthy new baby is definitely worth the wait, whether that's an 'early' 38 weeks or a 'late' 41+ weeks.

Were you early or late with your babies? Did you have any comments or unsolicited advice from people that you'd have rather done without?
---
Photo credit
---

Do you hide vegetables in your toddler's meals?

Whilst there might be an extensive range of tips, cookbooks and general encouragement out there towards hiding vegetables in food you cook for your child, the advice I was given recently in a family nutrition course was very much against such sneaky tactics.

The nutritionist and pediatric dietician running the course explained that by disguising vegetables and making them totally unrecognisable in dishes isn't going to ever help your child enjoy that particular food. It's important for them to see what they are eating and to try foods in different forms (raw/cooked/served in varying meal types etc). It can take up to 20 attempts at a food before a child accepts and enjoys it so it's worthwhile for the parent or carer to persevere and try presenting the food differently. 

The advice I was given makes sense to me. I can see why parents do hide vegetables in meals but equally I think it's important for children to learn about different vegetables, to recognise them and gradually gain an understanding of the seasonality of them too.

As a vegetarian, I've always enjoyed a wide range of vegetables and brussel sprouts and beetroot are the only two that spring to mind as types I really don't like (although I have found ways to eat both - in a soup and in a cake respectively). Whilst my son is a great eater with a voracious appetite, he's not terribly keen on any green vegetables. He'll eat peas and green beans but when it comes to the iron-rich dark green cabbages, kale and broccoli, he will barely touch them.

I know a lot of people who aren't big vegetable eaters but even their children will eat broccoli. I've therefore perserved in particular with broccoli and have tried presenting it in different ways but to no avail. My son still won't eat it. However, I'm slightly embarassed to say that if it's hidden in a broccoli cheese soup or in this yummy vegan pesto I tried recently, he eats it no problem. It's frustrating because surely the same flavour is there and he is getting the nutritional benefits from it and yet clearly, these recipes go against my no hiding vegetables rule.

Unfortunately I haven't been keeping track of how many attempts we've had at broccoli but I'm pretty sure we've reached the 20 mark. I'm not giving up on the dark green veggies with my son though! Whilst I certainly won't resort to hiding tactics all the time, I will allow myself the occasional exception that involves a recipe that the whole family enjoys.

What are your children like with eating their vegetables and green vegetables specifically? Have you discovered a particular recipe that they love and doesn't involve any hiding of the vegetable itself?
---
Photo credit
---

Less buggy, more walking

I was surprised to discover this week that the borough of London we live in has one of the highest rates of childhood obesity in the country. As a result, an article suggesting more parents make their 3-year olds walk rather than use the buggy in The Telegraph newspaper made its way to the mums group I belong to and help run. I thought it made an interesting discussion to share with you.

"Nickie Aiken, Westminster Council's cabinet member for children, and a fellow Conservative, told a newspaper that parents who relied too much on the buggy to ferry their young children from A to B risked damaging their charges' long-term health".

Ms Aiken, herself a mother of two, acknowledges that parents resort to the buggy to get to places fast but suggests that from the age of three, it shouldn't be used for short trips.

A mummy friend of mine made the point that she uses the buggy more from a safety aspect to get around busy London streets without worrying about her daughter running onto roads or getting squished on bustling London buses. More often than not, she uses the buggy on journeys that take her daughter to activities  involving physical activity, like swimming, football or running around in the park.

When I think about my own usage of the buggy, it definitely tends to be for journeys that I know are too long for my son to make there and back. We always just walk to the local park, nearby classes or playgroups and to the local shops. His nursery is too far and we'd have to leave very early to make it on time and he's still at the stage where he's exhausted when I pick him up at lunchtime.

Being pregnant has probably meant I've relied on the buggy a bit more recently than usual. If I've known I needed heavy shopping or something that I can store on the buggy and push along rather than carry whilst supervising a walking toddler then I have taken the buggy. Even then though, I usually try to encourage my son to walk alongside it rather than stay sitting in it.

My guess is that time is the biggest reason parents reach for the buggy. Very often we are rushing to get somewhere for a particular time and we haven't factored in a toddler's slower walking pace into the time we allow ourselves to get there. We can't expect their little legs to keep up with an adult pace and whilst they might enjoy running in the park, it's a different story when you're trying to hurry them along a road to get to nursery or a class because you haven't allowed the extra time needed.

What is your buggy usage like? If you have an older toddler, when did you phase out the buggy significantly?
---
Photo credit
---

Chocolate recipes for Chocolate Week

Yes really, we're coming to the end of Chocolate Week! Whilst I have lots of favourite chocolate recipes I like to make, I thought I would look around for some new ones to share with you. Here are three I came across and like the sound of, in case you feel like making something chocolatey for the weekend....

Chilli chocolate fudge cake - I only quite recently tried the chocolate chilli combination but I love the way the contrasting tastes work together. This recipe also contains nuts and tahini, which I think go very well with chocolate. The ingredients, along with simple instructions for throwing this cake together all sounds like a winner to me.

Chocolate biscuits with soft chocolate centres - I chose this Jamie Oliver recipe because he suggests it's a good one to do with your children and with lots of cutting of circles to be done, as well as placing of chocolate squares, it certainly seems very child-friendly. From the comments, it looks like several people had trouble with the dough being too crumbly to roll out but someone posted that you can fix the problem either by leaving the dough in the fridge longer or adding a little water to make it more pliable.

Chocolate orange muffins - This recipe comes from fairtrade chocolate company, Divine and uses their milk orange chocolate chopped up, along with some orange rind to bring out the complimentary citrus chocolate flavours. It also uses yoghurt, which I find always gives a nice consistency in cakes.

Do you have a chocolate recipe to share, either a trusted favourite or something you've seen recently that you think sounds yummy?
---
Photo credit
---

3 easy autumn crafts for toddlers

We're enjoying a very pleasant autumn in London. Most days there's sunshine, it's not too cold but there's a bit of a chill in the air and crisp golden leaves aplenty falling on the tree-lined streets and in the parks. As with all the seasons, it's nice to embrace what they bring to the time of year and engage in the changes in nature around us. With that in mind, here are 3 very easy art/craft projects you can do with your toddler (probably best suited to ages 1-3), focusing on autumn leaves:

Leaf collage - this is super-simple and something I did with my son when he was aged 1. Collect a bunch of leaves of assorted sizes, colours and types. Bring them home and let your little one loose with the glue and the leaves, sticking them at will on a large piece of paper. It's not about making a pretty picture but allowing them to enjoy the textures of the leaves and having some free creativity.

Leaf print - bring home a leaf or two. Placing a leaf under a sheet of paper and using a crayon over the top enables your toddler to make an effective and attractive leaf print (pictured).

Tree picture - draw a tree trunk and branches for your child on a large sheet of paper. They can either colour in the tree trunk or could stick brown paper to it. Provide some cut up pieces of coloured paper, fabric, foil, whatever you have and some glue and let your child stick the bits and pieces onto the paper as leaves. They can't go wrong with sticking them on the branches, the tree trunk or around the tree!

Do you have any other simple ideas to share, either that you've done yourself at home or seen elsewhere online?
---

Getting close!

Our first son was born at exactly 38 weeks. Of course that doesn't mean subsequent babies will also arrive 'early' but in our case, it means you are prepared in the event they are! First time round, everyone told us he/she would likely be two weeks late so we hadn't even considered the two weeks early scenario. Once we got home with our newborn, my husband was frantically assembling flat-packed baby furniture, we had no name for our baby boy and generally were a bit disorganised.

This time round we have the reverse situation of being totally on top of everything (except maybe the baby's name!). In addition to all the baby stuff being washed and ready, meals have been cooked and frozen and even some Christmas presents bought and wrapped. We passed the 38 week mark a couple of days ago so now I'm experiencing things I never went through last time:

• Wondering when our little one will arrive! I was so taken by surprise last time that I didn't have the time to really think about it.
• Calls, questions and comments from family, friends and acquaintances about the baby still being in utero. I could understand this more if I was at my due date or past it but didn't expect it now.
•  Excitement! Partly because I feel we're as ready as we can be for our new addition to the family, I'm really getting excited to find out the sex and to meet our baby.
• Nerves. As well as the excitement, there's also naturally some trepidation as to how our son will react to his sibling, how I will cope with a newborn and a toddler, how my husband and I will survive on those sleepless nights to come and whether they'll disturb our good sleeper of a son.......
• Realistic expectations. Unlike first time round, I am somewhat comforted by knowing what to expect with a newborn and recognising that however hard it might seem some days, it all passes and new stages come and go. Other mums I know who have had two or more children have all said how they have been more relaxed with the second child, simply as a result of it not being such unknown territory!

Amidst these emotions and thoughts, I'm trying to stay relaxed and keeping on with our daily lives as normal. At some point soon a new chapter will unfold for our little family and who knows what it will bring. For now I am treasuring life as it is and relishing our special little family of three before it becomes a family of four, equally special but also very different no doubt!

If things go quiet on Mummy Zen all of a sudden, you'll know why ;-)
---
Photo credit
---